Saturday, May 22, 2010

Cracks me UP!

I just think that it is hysterical, that I can have a handful of posts with ZERO comments, but you DARE to speak out against breastfeeding, or say that it isn't the holy grail, and all the breastfeeders come out of the woodwork and have all kinds of things to say. Not one person commented on the Extended rear facing post, which is actually about something so important, i.e.SAVING lives....Nope, only condemming me for "misinforming" the poor uneducated public about breastfeeding.


Seriously, if you look to blogs for actual information on how to raise your child, or how to make actual discisions on how to feed your baby, than you have a bigger problem at hand. If you say I am so wrong, than these poor saps can go "google" it like the rest of you did, and get all there little "studies" or "scientific facts" about breastfeeding, and learn that I am sooooo horribly wrong hahaaa...Come on people. This....is....a...BLOG!! Get over yourselves.


I will never sit here and say that breast is best, because I simply do not believe that. I believe that it is at best, equal. That is my opinion! Why do you care? I feel that women are being misinformed left and right about breastfeeding. They are told that it is natural and easy...sometimes it just ISN'T...They tell you that your kids will be healthier or smarter....sometimes this just isn't TRUE. They tell you that you will lose weight...ARE YOU SERIOUS? I have seen plenty of women who didn't lose the weight that breastfed. I gained plenty of weight with each of my pregnancies and LOST it ALL within weeks and I never breastfed. Everyone is different, and every baby is different. Your child in not going to be less sick just because you breastfeed...It just isn't true. Even the gap in percentages that the "studies" show is SOOOOOOO small...it is basically nonexistent. That is all misleading.

Go get your own blog and stop depressing mine. Thanks.

Monday, May 10, 2010

Hard Time Shopping!

Ok, so this may seem a little off topic from my normal mothering rants, but I just had to vent about this!!!!

I went to Kohls tonight to go shopping. I had a $25 gift certificate, and some money on my Kohls' card to spend, plus a 30% coupon! I was so excited to buy a couple new shirts, and a pair of shorts or capris.

I have to admit, that as a mother of 3, and being 28 years old, it is a little strange to still be shopping in the Juniors department, but I find the Misses section to be too elderly, matronly and conservative for my taste, nevermind the HUGE price increase.

The only thing I usually hate about shopping in the Juniors (besides the random cartoon on a Tshirt, or wierd splotches on some of the denim) is the fact that it makes me feel HUGE. I mean, in the Misses section, I am usually a 2-6, depending on the article of clothing, material, shape ect... But in the Juniors department, I am always a LARGE for shirts due to my size D breasts, and my not so tight tummy....and I am usually a 7-9 in pants due to the fact that I did have 3 kids, and my hips aren't exactly "boyish".

But today, I go in SUPER excited, when I see the latest items in the Junior department. I am a "hippie" at heart, and I love flowy shirts, crazy designs, peace signs (which I have been sporting for years, but now feel weird about it, because it is so trendy, and I hate that!) and funky tops, tie dye-"ish" shirts....I was so excited when I saw everything!!!

I PILED the clothes in the cart, and for once, I was all alone! No children with me, no nagging husband...nowhere to be...it was after 8:00pm, and my kids were either sleeping, or watching TV in bed(my oldest is 11)....so I was able to BROWSE!!! I love to browse! I really thought I was going to have a hard time deciding what to buy and what to put back!

Well, I finally get into the dressing room, eager to put things on. First off, Why the HECK does Kohls have such a hard time keeping their garmets on the appropriate hangers? I mean, when I want a medium or a large, and I get into the room and it is an XXXL...it is not helping me AT ALL!!!!

Secondly...I realize that everthing is HUGE! Not that I am skinny, and needed a smaller size...No...it fit just fine in the bust...but it was purposely HUGE...LONG as all hell, and WIDE! Some of the shirts had flaired sides...I mean...WHO WANTS TO LOOK LIKE A TENT?!?!?!?

I realized that it is because the newest "look" is the capri legging...so huge shirts with leggings...oh, and some of the manequins actually were wearing the capris UNDER shorts...who the HELL wants to wear that in 90 degree weather? Also, the shirts had so many straps, and layers, that your tan line would be a NIGHTMARE!!! It was just so strange.

Is it because teens/woman in their early 20s are bigger these days, and want to disguise their weight? Is teen pregnancy on the rise? Seriously don't get why anyone who is NOT pregnant, would want to LOOK pregnant! I was a teen mom, geez! I guess I was born 11-12 years too early! If I was a pregnant teen in 2010, I'd fit in beautifully, with this new preggo look that is hitting the shelves!

No one looks flattering in a tent. No one. Period.

So, after being totally discouraged, I decide that maybe it is time for me to "graduate" to the adult, woman section. So I admit defeat, and I mosey on over to the very strange land of even numbered clothing, with shirts that cost $24.99 on sale...I see clothing that I would never be able to wear. Shirts that would look great if I had somewhere special to go, or if I was worried about showing too much skin....Neither which I am particularily concerned about. I want TANK TOPS! I do not want to cover my shoulders and neck!!! Seriously!

I notice that Lauren Conrad now has a line in the Misses department...Lauren Conrad does not scream "old woman" to me when I watched her on MTV's "The Hills"....It was the most immature groups of girls I have ever seen! I doubt any of them shop in the misses section...Why the hell is she creating these old woman looks??? (No offense to any older women out there) I just don't get it.

I finally went back to the Juniors department, and grabbed a pair of capris and a regular old tank top, and headed for the cash registers, totally disheartened, and feeling like I didn't belong anywhere in this suddenly foreign store, and realized that my stupid coupon isn't valid until Wednesday. FML. Seriously. When I go back, I probably will end up spending the money on my kids, who always look age appropriate, fit into their clothes, and don't have to worry about tan lines.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Your Kids Must Have Been Breastfed!!!

My kids are never sick. Well actually, I lie. They just became sick last week. My 20 month old got her very first ear infection last week, and my almost 6 year old got his very first case of strept throat today. But, before this, NONE of my 3 children have ever been sick. My oldest is 11 years old, and has never had an ear infection, never had strept throat, the flu, a cold, nothing. He has only missed school 2 times because of a "sickness" and it was because he said his throat hurt, but no strept throat, probably seasonal allergies, which he has a very mild case of, every once in a while.

My other two have never been sick either except for the one case each that I mentioned. None of my children have food allergies, or ashthma. None of them are obese..quite the contrary. The are all very intellegent as well.

So the first question people always seem to ask is, "Did you breastfeed?" I try not to laugh when I answer them, but it is so hard not to. After years of people telling me how important it is to breastfeed, I have always remained adamantly against it.
People look at me like I have ten heads when I explain that I am actually pretty dead set against breastfeeding in this day and age.

"But it is natural!!" It was natually hundreds of years ago, when mothers knew where all their food was coming from and nothing had high fructose corn syrup, pesticides, growth hormones and other added crap. I am sorry, but there is NOTHING natural about a mother eating foods that are filled with added crap, and then passing it on to their poor innocent child.

"But your body naturally filters out those bad things!" Bull! Why can't you drink, or smoke or take certain medications while breastfeeding? Why if your child has a food allergy, you have to omit that from your diet if you are breastfeeding? Your body was not designed to filter out the unnatural crap that is in our food these days.

So many mothers breastfeed their babies because they are misled into thinking it is the quickest route to healthy children. When their kids are always sick, they are brainwashed into thinking it would have be so much worse if they didn't breastfeed!! They are conditioned to think that this is all a mother needs to do to make sure their kids are healthy, and if they don't do it, they don't love their children enough, or that they are not good mothers. It is sick.

The funny thing is that so many mothers breastfeed their kid for the first months or even years of life and then never think about what they are putting into their childrens' mouths after! As if their breastmilk will last them all the days of their lives! HELLO!!!! You need to make sure you aren't giving them crap afterwards either!!

So many mothers blindly feed their kids applesauce with high fructose corn syrup (HFCS) or added sugar when they could easily give their kids the Natural applesauce that is the same price, and RIGHT NEXT TO THE OTHER CRAP!!!!!! But they don't think twice. Same goes for yogurt, and juices. They just assume that they are all created equal and that they are healthy. They don't think to add veggies or fruit to things, or ake other healthy choices. They seriously think that their breastmilk will cover them!

Unless you are willing to only eat organic, natural, locally grown foods, you are not equipped to breastfeed. Unless you can cut out all the pesticides, preservatives and additives out of your meals, your "milk" is no better than my canned formula. In some cases, it is MUCH worse. You need to eat healthy to produce something healthy.

Plus, with formula, you have a happy mom, instead of a stressed out, uncomfortable mom....a happy, FED baby, instead of not even knowing how much they got to eat. And you know EXACTLY what is going into their little bellies. Breastfeeding may be natural, but it is also natural that some mothers are not able to breastfeed, physically. Those babies "naturally" died. Nowadays, such mothers pump themselves full of pills to make their milk come in! They are actually pumping medications into their babies so they can feel like they did a good job!

There is no "Mother of the Year" award. You are not going to get it in the mail. Your baby is NOT going to be more healthy. Your milk is not natural if you don't eat naturally. If you don't feed your baby, toddler and child healthy, natural foods, they will NOT be healthy, no matter how long you breastfed for!!!!!

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

The Big Carseat "Debate"

So most people know that you are required by law to keep your child rear-facing in their car seats until 1 year old AND 20 pounds. A lot of people switch their baby the second they hit those requirements, with joy, like it is some sort of milestone. What most do not realize, is that this is an extremely risky move. That is the MINIMUM. Children are 5 times safer in the rear-facing position than in the front-facing position. FIVE TIMES!!! What is the debate? It is scientifically proven to be safer. So, why switch them? Here are many of the "reasons" mothers say they switch so soon:

1. "My child hit the required height and age, I am not doing anything illegal."
Well, it is now being recommended by the AAP that toddlers should remain RF until at LEAST 2 years old and 30 pounds!! Also, it will take time for these new recommendations to take affect legally. Who cares if it is legal to switch them? What does that have to do with the fact that your child is no longer as safe?

2. "My child's legs were getting smushed, and I was afraid that he/she would break a leg in a crash!"

I have never heard of broken legs due to a tall child being RF. Also, a broken leg is MUCH better than a broken spine. Also, the child can comfortably cross his or her legs and sit "Indian style" which is actually more comfortable for them than letting their legs dangle over the edge of seat.

3. "My car seat's weight limit for RF was reached, and my child is too tall."

There are SO many affordable seats that RF until very high weight and height limits. My daughter is currently in a seat that RF until she is 53 inches tall and 40 something pounds!!!! Research the seats, and many seats will last until the child is ready to move out of carseat/booster meaning you won't have to ever purchase another seat!

4. "My child was too fussy or cried too much sitting RF. I needed to switch to keep my sanity and to keep her happy!"
By the time many kids are reaching these legal limits, they should be able to learn certain expected behaviors. Behaving in the car is a huge lesson that should be taught young. Also, most kids who dislike the car RF, still dislike the car FF. Also, try things like coloring books, snacks (that they can not choke on, and in one of those snack trap cups, so they can't spill or grab big handfuls), music, toys, singing to them, talking to them, or give them a sippy or their pacifier. My daughter was not allowed the paci after 12 months EXCEPT in the car, and during bed/nap times. A paci addiction is less severe than internal decapitation.

It is so important to keep them facing backwards for as long as possible. A child's spine is not fully developed until they are at least 2 years of age. When in a rear end collision, the child's weight goes forward, and their bodies are strapped in, but their necks and heads are not. Their body is stopped, and their neck and head fly forward, snapping it. It happens way to often, and most childhood car deaths are caused by this injury. In Europe it is common practice to rear face until FOUR years old!!!!! It is safer for everyone to face backwards, but it would be a little hard to drive!!!

I don't understand how anyone can debate this topic. Most people are not aware of Extended Rear Facing. Most people do not understand or know the dangers. I myself didn't do it with my oldest two. 11 years ago, you didn't RF convertable car seats at all, you only RF the infant carrier! My son was FF at 5 months old!!!! YIKES! When my 6 year old was a baby, it was only really becoming recommended to RF until 1, and I thought it looked "unsafe" to have the seats facing like that. In fact a lot of seats weren't designed to face that way. I didn't know the dangers. I didn't know, and I put my child at risk. Once I knew the dangers, I couldn't live with myself if anything happened, so I keep my daughter, at 20 months, rear faced in her car seat.

Monday, April 26, 2010

I mourn the loss of MY perfect birth.

There are people out there that actually say this. "I am in mourning over the loss of my perfect birth."

They are absolutely beside themselves because their baby was "ripped" from their womb via C-section, or that they were "forced" into taking one drug or another from the "evil" doctors and nurses.

There are people who believe that babies that come into this world by C-section are not really born at all, and that they are "missing something". Yes, I have actually heard (and read) mothers saying this.

This is their reason for absolutely needing a home birth. Some, desire totally unassisted births at home, meaning NO help or experienced person helping at all. They are willing to put their unborn baby at risk JUST to preserve their "perfect birth experience".

It is funny when these mothers lament over the death of their treasured birth experiences you hardly ever hear the word "baby" or "child" mentioned. You will hear the word "me", "I", and "my" dozens of times.

When you have a baby isn't the most important person your child? Who the hell cares what you have to go through to get him or her here? As long as they are safe and healthy, who cares what color the walls are or whether it was done in a freaking tub or not? Wouldn't staring into your child's eyes for the first time erase all the bad feelings and memories of anything that happened before? Isn't it ALL worth it?

I would rather go through a medicated, induced, emergency C-section that results in a healthy, ALIVE baby than have a beautiful, quiet, serene, natural home birth in a tub with music playing that results in a DEAD baby. And too many times that is exactly how those births turn out, with DEAD babies.

Oh, and those that will tell you that "statistically" more babies die in hospitals than at home, forget that even deaths that are a direct result of a home birth, but the infant is brought to the hospital via ambulance or the parents at the last minute to try and save them, have to be recorded as a hospital death. Also, not all home deaths are recorded at all.


As a mother I KNOW all the problems that can happen during delivery and to a baby right after birth. Minutes are crucial. Those who say, "Well I am moments away from the nearest hospital if anything goes wrong!" Do you realize that in a matter of minutes or even seconds, you can lose your child to something that would have been caught right away at a hospital? Are you willing to live with yourself if your baby does not make it to the hospital in time? Is it worth it?


And to those who say, "Women have been giving birth since the beginning of time, it is natural"......Well babies have DIED since the beginning of time, and the only reason that infant mortality rate is so low is because of all of our MEDICAL advances. So have your "natural" birth experience, but be ready to deal with the "natural" consequences.

Being a mother isn't about YOU.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

"You Really Need a Blog"

So, after many months of people saying that I "really need a blog" in response to many of my ramblings on motherhood, and total disgust for most that I see or read day to day, I finally decided to write one. Who will read it? Don't know or really care!

I have tried over and over again to start one. I change the title, and the first post over and over, trying to say something clever or at least mildly interesting. But I figured since the first post is most likely the most challenging, I might as well just DO it.

So here I am, bitching about everything from Dr. Sears, to breastfeeding, to my least favorite term "baby wearing". I feel like these days so much pressure is placed on mother's to be perfect or "Mother of the Year" and that these mothers, while competing in this rat race, end up being absolutely miserable, with equally miserable children.

I also do not believe in reading book after book about how to raise children. After all, they are future human beings, not science projects or hobbies. I mean if you seriously think that any one with a published book and the title "Dr." in front of their names know more about YOUR child than you do, I think you may have issues.

Not that I have distaste for all child-rearing books. Just ones that leave little to know room for improvisation, or anything that claims to have a solution for ANYTHING. Books about how much to feed your baby, or that you should put them on their backs to sleep, or how to care for the umbilical chord, yes.....Books on how best to "bond" with your baby, HELL NO.

I believe in sharing information and EXPERIENCE with other mothers, or figuring it out as you go along. I believe in making mistakes, and letting your child be the teacher.So many people are obsessed with their books, theories, or what is "best" that they are cemented in their decisions before their baby is even born. They refuse to change or look at it from different angles.

I am the first to admit that I may change my mind about an issue half way through a discussion about it, just by looking at it differently. I am flexible with most things and some people think I am fickle. I say I am forever growing and changing, and so should my viewpoint. Don't be surprised if you find me contradicting myself, or going back on something I may have once said. It is only because I am not too stubborn to say that I may have been wrong, which is what is wrong with most mothers out there.